He had to have stamina, had to agree to safe sex and had to be willing to be watched and possibly videotaped during sex.Oh, and he also had to be willing to pay for the hotel room. About a dozen men (all sizes, all races, all ages and physiques — from beer guts to washboard abs) respond to the post.
Occasionally, it’s not only about sex: The older couple might have the means to pick up the tab for lavish getaways.And nearly every time, Alex has become so aroused he must have “my needs met.” He laughs, then adds, “Once I’m taken care of, it makes it easier for me to let somebody else (screw) my wife.” He guesses his wife has slept with “about 20” other men — all different flavors, but all bigger than average (and bigger than Alex) where it counts. “If you’ve never done it, I can’t explain it,” says Alex. People say it’s because we’ve been married so long and we’re bored. We have a great sex life together, but we’re both adventurous. Both insist they’re immune from jealousy: “It’s only sex,” Susan says.She knows I’m watching and that turns her on, too.” Occasionally, they engage in a full swap, which means Alex will have sex with the other man’s wife; or a soft swap, which means no penetration — he can receive oral sex from a woman with Susan’s blessing. “We’re not falling in love with them.” Whatever your sexual appetite — say, you both want to be with a woman, or you both want to be with a man, or she wants to be with several men at once, or she likes husky men and you crave female leprechauns with foot fetishes — well, you can find it out there.But Marty Tashman, a marriage counselor for 34 years in Middlesex and Somerset counties, isn’t buying it. Sexual adventure might be exciting for a while, but it gets old. In the best cases, couples say, ‘We did it, we tried it, but we’re done with it.’ ” But why do they do it? Are they momentarily rebelling from a life of always doing the right thing?Are they exploring fantasies, but doing so with their partner’s blessing?